I am sure you have heard about the concept of duality. Basically, it talks about the existence of two different or opposing elements. Duality was introduced as a concept in Buddhism 1000’s of years ago. Some of the most important things in life boil down to a dual state of existence. For example, day and night, life and death, sun and moon, good and evil, fire and water, inside and outside, love and hate, up and down, and so on. You could probably think of hundreds of other examples. So, why am I talking about duality? Well, dualities are a reality of our everyday lives, and they can make things a little difficult at times. As such, you should know how to deal with them. Take, for example, the choice between duty and desire. Which one do you think you should pick? The answer is not that easy in all circumstances, is it?

Duty Vs Desire

On the one hand, you have your duties. These are things that you are supposed to do or are expected of you. For example, as a parent, it is your duty to provide for your little children. As a doctor, it is your duty to look after the patients to the best of your ability. And, in general, it is your duty to do things that take you closer to your goals.  We all know the importance of doing our duties diligently. In fact, when you don’t adhere to your important tasks, you may feel guilty or selfish. A voice inside tells you that you’re doing something wrong. That’s your conscience doing its work. Have you ever chosen to rest when you were “supposed” to go to work or prepare dinner for your children? How did it make you feel on the inside? Not great, I presume.

On the other hand, you have your desires. These are things that you want to do with all your heart. It might be something as little as wanting to have a snack or something bigger like going on a holiday. No matter how much you ignore them, you can never really kill your desires. And, if you ask me, you shouldn’t do so anyway. After all, your desires originate from the depth of your being. As such, you have a need to honour them. You have a need to honour the self by working with your desires and not always your duties. This is why, when you ignore your desires, you feel really bad and disappointed.

As you can see, the dilemma between duties and desires creates a conflict. What are you supposed to do at any given time? How are you supposed to act? Well, the answer is what you would expect: balance. It always boils down to balance, doesn’t it?At any given moment, you can only choose one of the two opposing sides. However, over time, you can make sure you achieve a balance between your duties and desires. There will be times when your duties will take precedence and you will have to tend to them with integrity. And at other times, your desires should become your priority and you should focus on living your best life.

In fact, you can deal with most dualities of life in this manner. All you need is sincerity and integrity. Why only limit yourself to one flavour of life while you can enjoy the whole rainbow? That’s the point of being on this planet, isn’t it? Try everything and maintain a balance. If you can do so, you will have lived a full-fledged life.

Elephant Shoe Podcast has an audio take on this